Sunrise and Pretend

We stood on that pavement
The sky heavy
With its soon-to-be rain
Saying our good-byes
Hoping that it wasn’t
The last touch
Or the last sound
That meant
We were still each other’s

Your dark eyes still
As always
Your voice telling me
Not to think of it as a mistake
Mine full of tears
With a shakiness
So uncertain of my future
And us

The truck was waiting
But we held on
In that embrace
So unlike the ones
We had found ourselves in before
We promised each other
This wasn’t really good-bye
Not wanting to let go
Of what we were
And who we could be

It could’ve been our last
So I told you I loved you
Like always
A few words of hope
From your lips
A nod of agreement
And the last visible tears
Transferring their wetness
Onto our hands

Years later you said you were proud
Of what I’d done
I told you my life was better
But that I missed you sometimes
Your arms were safe and tender
Just like I remembered
The smell of expensive cologne
Making it seem as though
We were still stuck in what was

We tried to promise what we couldn’t
A life of what could be
I still miss you sometimes
And wonder if we were crazy
For wanting to stay embraced
In a world of only sunrise and pretend